Thursday, February 25, 2010

Wow It's A New Year...

WELCOME 2010. I AM READY....
I THINK!

I am the worst blogger. Go ahead, its ok. Let me have it.  I have a new found regard for you mommy bloggers who keep up with your blogging. Life has kept me beyond busy as the rest of you. I begin my fog like state early September and wake up early January...each year. This year I had more than the ordinary keeping me busy as well. 2009 was about reinventing myself professionally and as a mommy. I lost my job, jump started my actual career, became a mommy of a preschooler and all that has to offer and I remained a wife to a husband with a disability   Oh and of course 16 days before 2010 arrived I became 40.


So far 2010 has not been good to my pets and I pray that changes next week.  Early in 2010 we lost our 17 year old cat, Misha. She died peacefully in my arms at the clinic just as I was just about to put her down. Wow. And recently I received news my 11 1/2 yr old Golden Retriever Cobey (who had surgery last week to remove a growth from his foot) had a cancerous tumor.  We go next week for an ultrasound of his spleen as there was a nodule there and we are checking for any changes.  Something weighing on my mind daily.  I recieved this information all the while my husband lay in an Epilepsy Study Center in a hospital, trying to get a better idea and  better treatment for his seizures (related to his car accident in 1995 thanks to a drunk driver).  Its been a rough start of the New Year but I am still optimistic as heck about 2010. I am going to claim the year as MY YEAR.

Of course that does not mean I stop taking care of the Daughter and Husband. It does mean though I start focusing on my health.  It's a must.  I can't ignore myself anymore. I want to be there for my daughter for a long and beautiful life.  I went on an anti depressant about 8 months ago due to stress/depression over the responsibilities I had to my family.  The weight of the responsibility was heavy on my shoulders and I needed some help in coping better. Ironically....this led to a more weighty situation....

I had  been on an antidepressant for 8 months 13 years ago. It worked well and I did fine with a short term therapy of this medication.  This time around I noticed something different.  A rather rapid weight gain. 40lbs in a little over a year! That has not happened except when I was pregnant with my RoRo.  Also, had a physical exam and my thyroid is underactive. The combination of the two may have put my body in a tailspin.  Its time. I am doing further testing on the thyroid so we will see if meds are necessary. I joined Weight Watchers. Its time. It has to be now.  Who else is on board!?!? It's ok if you have made this resolution before. Maybe this time your even more ready. Come join me. Let the fun begin!!! Keep you posted more often. I promise. Scratch that... I hope. I wouldn't want to break a promise! In the meantime keep your fingers crossed we have some more time with our love of a dog, Cobey. Thanks for the support!